On Vegetarianism

So word is officially out that I'm a vegetarian. Some friends never knew, some still don't, and some thought that I've been vegetarian for years. So for those who are curious to know the real journey, do read on.

I've always 'felt' for people, even as a kid. I only mention people because it didn't start that way with animals. My earliest memory of abusing animals was when I was in Grade 1 in Noranda Primary School in Western Australia. One of the school gardens had a wire mesh cage full of fluffy yellow chicks, and one of my pastimes, when no-one was watching, was luring chicks to eat blades of grass I would hold at the corner of the cage, and pull at their tails sticking out through the mesh. I knew it was wrong but I felt a sort of satisfaction that I exercised power over something smaller than me. Then there was the time when I was 11, when my cousins and I lined up live snails on the road outside my aunt's house, laughing til our sides hurt whenever a car passed by and made shards of snail shell whizz in all directions. I have since then taken long, drawn-out dips in the karmic pool. But I still do very vividly recall that feeling of superiority over other defenseless living things, and deriving pleasure from it.

(I think that is why I do not react so impulsively to blatant cases of animal abuse in Malaysia. I know what might be going through their heads. Like me, they just didn't know any better. Now that I do, I do get frustrated and angry, but I know that letting my emotions get out of control will not aid much in nurturing better mindsets, which is the real solution.)

Luckily, I was given the gift of a proper education. I learned how to read, and devoured books on nature. The initial thought eventually occurred: If I like animals, why am I eating them? I first entertained the thought of going vegetarian as a college freshie at 16. For the first time, I was in a canteen, in charge of picking my own food. That mock 'char siew' sure looked interesting. I also met my first Malaysian vegetarian friend, Janet Lee. I ended up eating vegetarian food as regularly as I felt I could bring myself to, even if it was just once a week. It gave me such an ego trip that I decided to try skipping meat at family dinners. My folks would have had none of it. I was told off and humiliated into putting chunks of beef or pork back onto my plate. One day at a coffee shop, my father threatened to 'flip the table upside down' if I didn't eat my pork. Reluctantly, I gave up creating conflict on the home front, and agreed to the rule of “Whenever you are out, eat anything you want. When you come home, you eat what is cooked for you.”

But year by year, with the care taken by one tiptoeing through a room full of mouse traps, I executed my strategy of removing the meats one by one. First to go was beef and lamb. Ignorantly, I gorged myself on mock meats when I worked at ASTRO that year, in 2001. I couldn't help it – their cafeteria spread was delectable and hugely assorted. C'mon, if it's meat-free then it's healthy, right? Silly Davina. I refer to it as my 'Fat Elvis' period. Unfortunately, I barely have pictures from that era to illustrate this.

Then I went back to college, and dad's intimidating presence was lessened after starting a business in Sabah. I pushed my luck with my mom, with spare ribs being comically passed from one plate to another. Mother was relentless. Most times, I would let her win.

Dad separated from the family in 2007. By then I had already been making known my support for animal rights, and almost dropped chicken completely from my diet. I still felt like I was cheating my way into being called a vegetarian – to some people, fish doesn't count as a meat – but I was thinking to myself Hey, I care so much about animals, and I'm doing so much for them already... Isn't eating seafood a fair compromise? In 2010, I moved out and taught myself how to cook vegetarian food, and only relying on fish when access to my nutrient needs outside seemed difficult.

This year, shortly after recovering from my appendectomy, I gave up my pescetarian ways and emancipated myself from a life of self-doubt. My 12 years of patience and greater awareness had finally paid off.

Even with only fish in my diet, I felt lighter and more energetic. My skin cleared up. My frequency of sickness was the most apparent, from several times a year to once in a blue moon, and my recovery rate vastly accelerated. Mind-wise, I feel more focused. I no longer need to worry about the animals that died for my sustenance, and now I can invest the energy I used for doing that into other productive thoughts and nuggets of creativity.

The reasons why I have turned vegetarian has varied over the years. I was brought up to believe that compassion was a trait of human weakness (it is, in truth, the exact opposite!), so I usually covered up that stance with health, environmental and political reasons without even fully interpreting them for myself. But over the past few years I have exposed myself to research, to videos, to undercover findings. I have educated myself to the point of no return. One of my strongest reasons, at this moment, is the ways of the factory farm. It is to me the most impractical, unethical and unsustainable part of modern living. If I was brought up in a poor rural village somewhere, tending to a traditional farm, toiling the fields, tending to the animals, and slitting goat throats with my own knife and hands for dinner, I would most likely have not felt the need to go vegetarian. Alas, I live in a society that directly supports a system of gross maximum profit, minimizing financial costs at the expense of the environment, to animal welfare, and to our own health. Factory farming is such a money magnet that anything and everything is being done to keep the proverbial wool over our eyes. And we, as consumers, are more than happy to endorse this, choosing to stay as disconnected as possible to the food that is on our plate.

This extends to the fishing industry too. Over the last year I have learned about 'bycatch' and fishing methods that destroy the ocean floor that is likened to deforestation on land... Oh My Heck. So much inefficiency. So much wasted life.

So this is the year that I have chosen to not be a part of it anymore. I represent what people fear to know and believe and acknowledge. That is why my beliefs get shot down so quickly by some non-vegetarians. Taste has always reigned over principle. Food is ingrained in our culture. We use food to fortify, to bond and socialize, to rejoice, to honor and reward. Eating meat is such a sensitive subject because EVERYBODY EATS. There is no grey area: in the most literal sense, it's a basic case of supporting the suffering and killing of animals, or just not. So if one does eat meat and is faced with the facts, the choices are also naturally clear-cut: to reflect inwards, or to defend or attack because it's more convenient. Those who do accept me for who I am now apologize or ask for permission before they eat meat in front of me. When I 'came out' with my appearance at a PETA demonstration earlier this month, little did I realize that my decision to go vegetarian also became the decision to make most people feel slightly uncomfortable around me for the rest of my life.

But it is going to allow me to learn more about the human condition. One of my ongoing pursuits in life is the pursuit of empathy. Where I come from in urban Kuala Lumpur, from a conventional Bak Kut Teh-slurping Malaysian Chinese background, I now am part of a minority of vegetarians-by-choice. I will be judged and challenged for my values. And I will strive to spread awareness to the best of my ability, as much as I will strive to be aware of thoughts and values that are different from mine. If anyone feels that they have a (yet another proverbial) bone to pick with me, I want to know about it! My only expectation is one's open, logical mind for a conducive exchange of experiences. My involvement with the PETA demonstration was not an attempt to diss or preach or instill my lifestyle onto my fellow friends. It was just a way of me saying “Hi Everyone, I'm doing this and it rocks my socks, and I am celebrating by sharing this knowledge with you just in case it might benefit you too. Don't worry it's free.”

Picture by Tati Ambia

Twelve long, emotionally turbulent years have lead me here, to one of the most exciting and significant turning points of my life. I am grateful that you are bearing witness to it. I look forward to starting this new chapter of further understanding each other, and bringing great salads to your parties.

Thank you for reading.

Lettuce be loved,

Davina

On mental nightcaps

As you retire to bed each night, it may be beneficial to think to yourself:
Did I live out today the way I wanted to?
Did I learn anything new that will make me better tomorrow, and tomorrow better?

On the Present

Do not dwell too much in the past or worry too much about the future. The most important moment for you right now, is now. Put trust in that, invest power in that, and life will follow its natural course of providing in your favor.

On Fallouts

Noone likes fallouts, but it's a natural process sometimes.

That doesn't mean we'll ever stop caring.

We each work in different ways, we each have our paths to take, and all of us deserve greatness.

Good Morning!

Isn't this amazing?

My sentiments could not be echoed more beautifully than that.
I found this message above a reception counter of Tahan Guesthouse in Taman Negara (Malaysia's National Park). Although I didn't stay there, I did Love the vibe of the place.

This is what guests see as they leave:



Good Morning To Your Awesomeness!

speaking of today, 2011

I am entering the last year of my twenties. A lot of my slightly younger friends perceive this as the last year they have before registering for geriatric wards, but age is gracious enough to prepare you for more age, if you get what I mean. It doesn't help that I'm a December kid. In Malaysia, everyone asks you for your age by the year, so it felt that I was twenty eight for all of one month, before being obliged to tell people that I was 'turning twenty nine this year'.

But I digress slightly.

Most of my friends know that I put in a birthday post as kind of a tradition. Part of me thinks how wankerly it is; another part considers it as a favor I do for myself, a checkpoint to reflect on my life, just in case I'm subconsciously slipping bribes to my synapses.

I think this year, I've been operating cleanly. Or could that be the 'donation' speaking?

Two thousand eleven was one big rush, and I have not sat down yet. Today is a day like any other. I got to work late because I got stuck at home trying to trace a misplaced phone; I slept 4 hours in distress of a damaged hard drive containing years of work and memories; tonight I am performing the preview for a brand new murder mystery called 'Klue Doh!', a Malaysian-Australian collaboration that will be staged until 17th December. As a no-downtime milestone, Klue Doh! will be the third and final theatre project I will be engaged in this year. Knowing me, there would have been a fourth if the year lasted a tad longer.

It's a huge leap from my humble 4-month recluse in Burma. In fact, I now do recall stepping fresh off the plane in February and heading straight into the first script reading of Klue Doh.

Burma was amazing. I can say without blinking that She Changed My Life. I wanted to write an epilogue of my stint there, but I could not find the right words. I haven't even shared all my pictures of Her, because it was that intimate of a relationship. Devastatingly, I might not ever will now that my hard drive is dead. But if any one of my friends have intentions of visiting, I say go. Now. Keep your your mind open to understand, your heart open to appreciate, and She will sweep you off your feet, rest your head on Her bountiful lap and need you with grapes. Or even better, the fermented liquid manifestation of it. (As a non-drinker, I confess I took a sip from a glass of cheap-as-chips local honey wine; it was humble and glorious.)

I've had many moments this year where I have had to swallow my pride, cry even, in fear that I was not able to accomplish what I had set myself up to do. Dancing next to trained dancers, conversing and singing in languages that don't come naturally to me, being treated unprofessionally, maintaining an LDR, loosening principles to save my ass in a foreign country, re-homing an animal... And still finding greatness in all of it. Making myself small has made life appear so much bigger.

"Should prosperity befall thee, rejoice not and should abasement come upon thee, grieve not, for both shall pass away and be no more."

- from The Hidden Words of Bahá'u'lláh

I started off my birthday passage last year with a Baha'i quote, which ever more represents what I have experienced this year. I've earned big jobs, I've lost big jobs. I've been sneered at, I've been cheered at. I've taken amazing pictures, I've lost an entire bank of memories. People have given birth; people have died. The cosmos has this amazing sense of balance, and I am constantly learning to honor that. A couple of weeks ago, I took a 2-day retreat to Bali. The evening before my flight home, I sat on the beach by myself, and watched the colors of the sky mingle and dim, and I remembered all this, and I took in the world, and I cried.

Sometimes it takes knowing someone else to know yourself better. I've spent the most part of the last three years on my own, constructing and de-constructing whenever, and I figured that self-accountability was something I could get used to. I have had moments where I've mistakenly assumed that my own principles ran the status quo. Thanks to friends and family, my joyrides to Doucheville have always been shortlived.

I've started hanging out with a guy. Our paths crossed in a peculiar way, but I think he's neat, he thinks I'm neat too, and together we have found a steady state of neatness. I haven't clicked so well with someone in a long time. Once I managed to translate my 'fear of commitment' to a 'fear of re-learning me', everything became so simple. Any opportunity to evolve is golden, and more so when it involves an utter stud muffin.

I have not felt so 'centred' in my life... it feels really dope. I'm itching to bloom and love and create. Growing 'old' is not a bane as much as it is the privilege of making each day as amazing as it can be, and as important as you are to yourself. Today I grieve my losses but I know I will be better. I am grateful and proud to be where, who and how I am. I am grateful for my ups, my downs, my body, my family, my dog, my work, my friends, my community, my partner, my dreams, my breath… on a day like any other.

Off to the theatre! Thank you for reading, thank you for your wishes, and may you continue to create this day.

Your fellow inventor,

Davina

The Road More Travelled

Originally written for Michelle Tan's The Love Culture (http://theloveculture.wordpress.com/). Thank you Mich for providing an avenue to share, and encouraging me to post up my piece in full.

As a full-time events manager and fuller-time performer, one of the constantly pressing issues is getting around to do work. For the past 7 years, I have been relying on public transport to get around the Klang Valley. This fact seems to trigger various strong responses from people, considering how the Malaysian public transport system is notorious for being inefficient and unreliable. For the past 7 years, an uncountable number of people have urged me to get myself a car. But no matter how many times I get myself into trouble for being tardy for rehearsals or appointments due to a late bus or train, no matter how persuasive friends can get in the perks of driving, I still end up making the choice of strolling, running, looking both ways, climbing, sweating, panting, slipping & falling... reaching my destination flustered, and apologetic if the occasion requires it.

Why? is what most ask me. Why do that to yourself? Why submit yourself to a lifestyle so impractical for the careers you have?

Because as perverse as it initially sounds, I find it worth the adventure.

Having spent the most recent couple of years learning a lot about myself than I ever have, I have begun practicing the art of voluntary simplicity. Back in 2004, I could get away with saying that I couldn't afford it, and by now I have indeed saved enough to invest in a set of wheels. But I have chosen not to... not because I am miserly. And the environmental benefits of not owning a car is just the tip of the iceberg.

Using a car offers a world of convenience; it allows for the most linear, straightforward journey from Point A to Point B. Urban culture takes pride in the concept of efficiency. Taking public transport is seen as a last resort... it consumes relatively generous amounts of time, compounded by unpredictable travel schedules.

For a very long time, I was very frustrated with this. But I then decided to not allow such conditions to be a 'waste of time' by reading books, writing, and letting myself get lost in thought - which, I realized, is actually quite a luxury for me these days.

Using my legs to get me around leaves me in awe of them. I've been taking morning runs to maintain my stamina and as I lather myself up in the shower, I feel the strength of my thighs and calves. It brings me joy that my legs are healthy and functional, and why not make the most of that? I will let them take me as far as they can until I age and one day can use them no more.

One of the most rewarding aspects of public transport is the sensory ambush. I have probably seen, heard, felt, smelled and tasted more of the city than the average car driver in KL. The the pathways, the back alleys, the street food, the sea of faces... they never cease to fascinate. I look up into the sky and observe how tree branches compete for sun, how streetlamps flicker, how clouds form. I sit in the bus and hear arguments, laughter, languages I have never heard before, conversations randomly struck between strangers. I watch a flurry of hands as deaf friends discuss a topic undoubtedly exciting. I listen intently to the life stories of cab drivers. I teach toddlers on the train how to give high fives to the amusement of their mothers. I hold the hands of blind people as they cross the street in Brickfields, I sense the gentleness of their palms and the gratitude in their voice. The smell of jasmine, exhaust fumes, incense, sweat, rain, sewage and keropok lekor waft through my hair, besiege my nostrils, and hurl my floating state of mind back into the unique Malaysian madness I choose to be present in. Eyes of passing strangers meet mine and imbue me with a sense of community.

Commuting does have its fair share of risks, but that goes for every mode of transportation. Dishonest cab service, pickpocketing and public sexual harassment do exist, as do road accidents, aggressive motorists, and carjacks. It's just a matter of staying alert in our mode of travel and handling ourselves in the most ideal way with the decisions we have made.

There have been moments I have found myself less than appreciative of my country's flawed public transport system, but never for too long. A couple of weeks ago, I was feeling exhausted after a long humid day of work and extensive commuting around the city. I was making my way to my last appointment of the evening in Bukit Bintang, when I happened to pass by a group of street percussionists. Their pounding rhythms compelled me to stay a couple of minutes. One of the drummers spotted me bouncing in the crowd, and pulled me into the centre of their circle. Turned out they were performing their last song. To the cheers of the spectators, I put down my bags and unleashed my inner monkey. I met my friend sticky but revitalized. He asked, "What happened to you?" I laughed, and forgave myself for ever feeling ungrateful.

General consensus is that public transport in Malaysia is impractical and a waste of time. But with a new adventure that awaits the moment I step out of my house, with the subtle whims of Kuala Lumpur I have witnessed and become a part of, and the deep breaths I must take whenever people ask me how my day was, perhaps being impractical and wasting time isn't too much of a bad thing.

Female Shih-tzu mix (3 yrs) for adoption

Hello Everyone,

My older sister is giving up one of her 3 dogs for adoption.

Unfortunately, the previous owner 'disappeared' from correspondence before my sister was able to get details of her medical history.

JLo is estimated to be 3 yrs old, and we don’t know if she has been spayed or vaccinated before. She appears to be a mixed breed Shih Tzu, beige in color. She is a little on the lean side, but is otherwise healthy.

She’s not exactly the brightest bulb in the box, which has been a huge obstacle in my sister’s attempts to train her, including simple commands and toilet training. She’s terrified of the sound of rain and will hide anywhere to get away from it. She is a generally quiet dog, but is attentive and will occasionally bark if alarmed.

The one thing I can guarantee that she is good at is Love. She greets you in the morning and approaches people without hesitation the moment her name is called.

I am looking for a compassionate, responsible owner who will have the time and patience to look after her. My sister intends to surrender JLo to SPCA but I believe the pooch deserves another chance.

If you are interested or know anyone who might be, please email me at da_vina@graffiti.net, or drop me a line via my Twitter handle: @duuuhvina.

Please spread the word!

Sincere thanks and warmest wishes,

Davina

On Love

Last weekend, my older sister got married to her partner of ten years.

The night before, I had received news that a man I met in Scotland last year had passed away suddenly, leaving behind his partner of eleven years.

I was going to just write about how these two incidents have affected me, then along came the deaths in Norway, China, and of Amy Winehouse.

I shall continue to share what I had been meaning to share, but now with a concession that emotional fragility is now being shared between many around the world.

I feel like I have been living out one really long day since arriving back in Kuala Lumpur on Thursday night. I have barely been sleeping, partially because a part of me is still in another timezone, partially due to the anxiety and frustration of a freshly reconsidered relationship, amongst other things I can’t really put my finger on. I have surprised myself with this, knowing that everything that I do is my own doing… I have the power to put my own self at ease, yet I have decided not to. Perhaps it is because I know that these days, I don’t give myself time to give in to my humanness. So for the past few days, my excuse has been jetlag. Pretty crazy to see how much you can get away with when you tell people that. Today onwards, I get back into my busy mode. And I’m expected to pull my head out of my arse and get going again.

Saturday was a great day, obviously. My sister Melanie was all nervous and giggly. I’ve never seen her like that, well not in a long time at least. She grew up very fast, being the oldest in the family. She’s had a reputation for being a headstrong woman, occasionally excessively so. But she revealed a rarely seen side to her that was deservedly advertised. I remember the day I introduced her to my mentor at work – a popular announcer on Malaysian radio whom I had known as Johnboy. It was at an extreme sports event. At the end of the day, Johnboy sent me a text confessing that he thought Mel was cute, or hot, or some other generic pop term used to describe attractiveness. Despite the unconventional difference in age, he easily convinced my family that he was a keeper. Mel and John grew to be the sort of couple that you just knew would last through the ages, with or without marriage.

Claire and Frankie had been together for eleven years, definitely had the same vibe going. So finding a message from Claire on Friday night, informing me of Frankie’s sudden demise a few weeks ago, left me shocked and extraordinarily sad. I went to Frankie’s Facebook page, and saw the flood of wall posts from friends and family… dedications, video posts of his performances, news of a tribute gig, and most notably, Claire’s messages of love and longing. I cried uncontrollably.

Strangely enough, I had only met Frankie and Claire once, when my then-partner Stuart and I visited Scotland last year. Stuart’s friend Kyle heard of my coming to London, and invited us both to stay with him in his humble hometown of Dundee. It was quite a culture shock, a teetotaler being taken on day-long pub crawls, trying to interact with people who spoke an English I could barely understand. Kyle’s uncle Frankie turned up with Claire on a pub quiz night and after the game invited a bunch of us to their nearby apartment for some lounging and random jamming. Their place was small and inviting, filled with an amber glow. We brought up food and drinks and ate, laughed, sang, and I’m certain at some point I fell asleep but without offending anyone’s company. Frankie and Claire’s warmth and hospitality were one of my great memories of Dundee.

Knowing about the paths of two similarly long-term relationships going through two completely contrasting journeys is what has been shaking me up. To be frank, I was initially unfazed by news of my sister’s engagement. Now, I am terribly grateful for them. Fueling this appreciation is an incredible new fear, a fear of this neverknowing of where destiny will lead each set of lovers to, irregardless of the benefits of time or strength of a relationship.

I have yet to experience a long-term relationship with someone, or at least one that has been physically tangible. And I marvel at the courage and determination two individuals have when they decide to go the distance together. I am inspired by randomness but now realizing its magnitude, and how serious a business it can be, is making me feel more vulnerable than I’ve ever been.

My events managing work recently led to the staging of The Sound Of Music in Kuala Lumpur. I managed to catch some parts of it, including the scene where Maria, frightened of her growing feelings towards Captain Von Trapp, confides in Mother Abbess. Mother Abbess tells Maria that God has given her the capacity to love, but whether that love is manifested in living a pious life, or falling for someone, is Maria’s own prerogative that she must acknowledge. Or something like that. I’m crap at paraphrasing. But whatever I got from that scene, I took it to heart: this aptitude approach to love and our implementation of that.

As a young girl I used to believe, like many young girls, I would find the man of my life by the time I hit my late teens, then stay with him for several years, then get married at an age young enough to keep up with the life and times of our brood. I can’t imagine how different my life would be if that really happened! Pregnancy is an experience I would embrace if it happens, but my idea of motherhood has now, more than anything, evolved more into the idea of the passing on of human responsibility. I yearn to nurture tiny people, from my own womb or otherwise, and learn things from them too. I want them to celebrate compassion with me, and use it to change the world.

But in the meantime, I will give my love to the best of my capability, to people, creatures, places and things that nourish me and keep me whole.

Mourning is born from Love. May the rest of us live on ever stronger in faith, purpose, righteous energy, and as warriors of Love.

Yours in arms,

Davina

PS Dear Claire, if you are reading this, I never got round to telling you that Stuart and I absolutely loved your singing that night… Stu said you had a Joni Mitchell kind of quality! I am thankful that you shared your talent with us, and I do hope that you will carry on creating greatness with your voice and guitar. I think it is something you will always owe to yourself. Hang in there and stay amazing.

On Unity

Unity has nothing to do with race, age or religion. Unity happens with the collective realization that we are all made of badassery.

Oh Look!

From my office balcony this wet morning, I spotted a man and his toddler walking hand in hand down the back alley.

He was looking straight ahead. His daughter kept on slowing down, looking up at the buildings, at the back alley behind her and all around. The father was egging her on to keep his pace.

Age and routine takes the fun out of seeing. May we all wake up each day with a child's eyes.

At your service

This afternoon, I saw my colleague and two temporary staff come into the office after packing lunch, carrying styrofoam boxes in plastic bags. A few minutes later, before I stepped out for my own lunch, I decided to do something about my frustrations, and called for everyone's attention. I requested that if there was a need to pack lunch, then if it could be done using the re-usable plastic food boxes that have been accumulating in the utensil cupboard.

"Can they still be used? They're so old!" my colleague said. I told her I use them all the time, and they're clean.

She said that packing food in old plastic wasn't any more better than packing it in styrofoam. She didn't elaborate on why. Perhaps it was the questionable heat-releasing-toxins-from-plastic argument? Isn't it alright to pack hot food in plastic that shows a 'microwaveable' sign?

Regardless, I didn't probe into her statement and asked straight out, if everyone could switch to just taking out the empty containers, or if there was an issue with it, then I could buy proper lunchboxes for everyone from the supermarket, and if anyone found washing up to be a bother, then I would do the washing for them.

Everyone just kept quiet. It was as if I offended them.

I apologized for the strange request. "I'm just an environmental Nazi like that, you know how I am..." I gushed.

Silence.

"...Well, if you prefer styrofoam, then of course I can't really stop you," I added.

My colleague said, "Well, you've said your piece then." And went back to typing.

A little stunned, I turned to the temp staff. The two girls looked at each other, and one of them said, "I think we're okay like this."

I said okay, and quietly walked out to meet my friend for lunch.

I know it is not my place to change mindsets, but I still couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with anger and defeat. Urbanites are bombarded by the media about eco-everything, so I am certain that they were not ignorant of the intentions I was trying to convey. I did not vent and I did not preach. I offered an option and offered to absorb as much of the efforts involved in the change. And yet there it was... the (dare I say, Malaysian) flat-out attitude of not caring, not even a dedicating a second of consideration of the consequences of their actions as consumers.

It is, however, difficult to not offend anyone in that situation. No matter how sensitive one can be in tackling environmental awareness, you're always going to be painted out to be someone who goes out of their way to seem better than everyone else.

People always tell me, "It's good to have people like you around," and to be honest, I really don't like that. I don't want to be another person's excuse to slack off on doing the right thing. I don't want people telling me that I inspire them if they personally don't prove to themselves that I do.

I'm not a crusader, and I am not your social superior. I am a worker ant and I am executing my duties on autopilot.

Now, can you help me lift this branch up? It's mighty heavy!

What is Duh-vana?

"People have sought knowledge and to be wise
Climbing hills for better meditation
Say people are bits in a bowl of rice
Or like drops of water in an ocean
The world's full of worries, so don't add yours
Your own troubles are enough for yourself
Noone cares what happens behind closed doors
Noone else needs to think deeply and dwelve
Do not seek eternal enlightenment
Just let it all loose and let it all free
Do not pick at it; do not argument
Leave questions unanswered as they should be
When your head starts to float, you feel lighter
Then you'ld have reached the stage of Duh-vana."

- Albert Ng, April 2002.

Once upon a time, my friend wrote this sonnet as a light-hearted tribute to my own quest for enlightenment. Re-visiting it almost a decade later, it bears more significance than it ever did!

Welcome to my new journey towards Duh-vana.

Puppy for adoption: Rocky

A huge thank you to my friend Eugene for emailing this to me.

I found an injured puppy at Batu Caves on April 3, 2010. Rocky’s right paw had been run over by a motorcycle a week earlier. The accident severed a nerve and caused a bad wound that exposed his flesh. He was in danger of getting a serious infection. A kind shopkeeper at Batu Caves tried his best to care for Rocky and clean his wound, but he really needed proper medical attention.

With the help of several caring people, as well as Project Second Chance (an animal rescue and welfare initiative to neuter/spay stray dogs and cats and find homes for them) and Rocky’s own fierce will to overcome his misfortune, Rocky has been successfully treated by a private vet and has recovered well. He is an active, healthy, alert, and affectionate puppy. The wound is almost fully healed and closed over. Once healed, he will not need any special/extra medical attention and will be just the same as any normal, healthy puppy. Rocky is able to walk and even run just fine, except he won't be able to run as quickly as he would had been able to normally due to the severed nerve in his right paw. He will likely also have a little groove on the top of the right paw after full recovery.

Now, I am trying to find him a good home as I cannot keep him and the last resort would be to return him to the shopkeeper at Batu Caves. However, this is not the best option since Rocky will be just one of a pack of stray dogs that live there and the shopkeeper may not be able to provide him proper care. Rocky will not have a real home or caregiver there and would be vulnerable to being caught by dog catchers as he is so friendly and trusting. At Batu Caves, he could also be bullied by other stray dogs and may not have the size yet to protect himself and hold his own against bigger dogs.

Rocky is approximately 8 months old and probably is a Rottweiler mix. His medical history is as follows:

1) Dewormed in early April and mid-May. Can be dewormed every six months from now on

2) Vaccinated on 17 April, 2010, against: distemper virus, parvovirus, parainfluenza, adenovirus types I and II, leptospira icterohaemorrhagiae, and leptospira canicola

3) He has never had parvovirus

4) He does not have any history of communicable diseases that would make it impossible for him to live with other pets

5) He was neutered on May 25, 2010

If you or anyone you know might be interested in opening your heart and home to brave little Rocky, please do let me know at eugene.t.lee@aya.yale.edu or 012-316-0954. And please feel free to forward this to those of your contacts who may want to adopt a puppy or might be able to assist in finding him a good home. I have to decide what to do with him by this weekend as the funds for him are running low. It would be a shame to have to return him to Batu Caves.

Puppy for adoption: Rara

Thank you to my friend Theresa Chian for posting up this notice.

Rara was rescued from outside a factory in Bandar Kinrara, Puchong on 29 May, 2010. He was trying to run across the street and was at risk of being run over.

Rara is a 4-5 month old puppy with an adorable "Beagle face and ears". He is rather skinny now but loves to eat and play. Rara is super-friendly to human and dogs, knows the 'sit' command and will obediently do his business on grassy patch. He has been dewormed, free from tick fever and is a Parvo survivor.

He was tested positive for Parvo virus and has undergone treatment at a Private Vet in Puchong. He may still be shedding the remaining virus for the next 2 weeks but Doc said he is "safe" and more than ready to go to a fosterer's or adopter's home. Parvo virus will not affect human and vaccinated dogs but human handlers are advise to maintain good hygiene. Rara will receive his 1st vaccination jab after he has finish the shedding process.

Rara is currently boarding at the Vet's in Bandar Puteri, Puchong until he finds a home. Please call Teresa 017 330 7244 for more info or for viewing.

Klang pound mummy dog & puppies up for adoption

Hey Everyone,

Passing on an email. if anyone is interested, please call Eching (bless her tireless efforts). Her number is mentioned below.

Thanks a mill for the support and please pass on to anyone who may be interested.

In appreciation of y'all,
Davina


Dear Friends,

Would appreciate if you can forward these pictures to your friends who may be interested in adopting.

These are the pups rescued from Klang dog pound and need to go to good homes asap.

Thanks for helping our furry friends.
Eching
016 209 3155

1) 1st 6 pics of mummy dog & puppies ( 2mths) .. All have been dewormed and vaiccinated & spayed







2) Girl 5mths old.....Dewormed ,vaccinated and spayed


3) Mimi 5mths old ----small breed dewormed vaccinated and spayed

An anti-sharksfin thank you note to a newlywed

Dearest Angeline,

I could have sent this to you as a personal message, but my friends deserve to know what a bold and incredible person you are.

When I was on the way to your wedding dinner on the second day of Chinese New Year, I was, to be frank, sh*tting myself about the prospect of eating sharksfin soup at your event and insulting you in the process. (The last time I turned down a bowl at a friend's sister's wedding, my friend badmouthed and shunned me for months.) But I was taken by complete surprise when I examined the menu and saw no sign of such a dish - in its place, an equally delicious if not more nutritious double-boiled herbal chicken stew.

As your mother was making her rounds around the 28 tables in the ballroom, I stopped her to ask about the exclusion of sharksfin and she mentioned it was at your special request, for ethical reasons. My insides imploded! I knew I had to personally thank you when I had the chance, and I'm glad I did.

I know I made it quite clear to you that I share your sentiments, but I wish to applaud you again for supporting such an important cause. It would be a lie for me to say that I was not disappointed to discover that your new husband Richard doesn't see your point of view. I find it tragic that people still manage to attach this strange concept of luxury to 'exotic' food items. (My idea of luxury is having my future generations being able to witness the ocean in the same glory that I have had the privilege of being exposed to in my own lifetime.) But in this case, I must commend him for being obliging enough to let you have your way! So thank you Richard! You are awesome. :D

What I would also wish to stress on is the fact that the level of prestige at the dinner remained TOTALLY UNAFFECTED by your choice. Everyone STILL made it to the event looking like a million dollars, everything STILL went according to schedule, everyone STILL gorged themselves silly on the scrumptious 8(?)-course meal, everyone STILL 'yam-seng'ed til they lost their voices, the flamenco band STILL rocked the house (I LOVED them!), everyone STILL had an amazing time, and I'm sure the evening for the newlyweds was still, and always will be, one to be wholeheartedly cherished til the end of time. It is so important to know that people *can* contribute to change without creating disharmony.

It was also an encouraging experience to be sitting at the same table as you the evening after for Aunty Leng Leng & Uncle Welly's anniversary dinner. For once, it was nice to have someone to share disturbing glances with when the bowl of sharksfin was served. And the excuses people come up with to make themselves feel better about eating it AND make people like us look anal, presumptuous and uber-sensitive... no offense to the parties involved, but such arrogance never fails to amuse me. True, I'm sure there are incidences of caught sharks being used in their entirety. But if the frequency of such cases was prominent enough to debunk the cause, then why is the rebuttal so insufficiently publicized? If I really want to resort to playing such a game: if I don't see concrete evidence of the shark at my table being 100% utliilzed, AND being acquired through population-sustainable means, then I sure as heck am not touching it. Like I said, there is absolutely no compromise for a clear conscience!

For your reference, I think I have come across a link that is related to the information relayed to us last night (read the last comment):
http://siuyeh.wordpress.com/2009/07/15/say-no-to-sharks-fin-soup/

In a thank you note that has ended up WAY longer than originally intended, I just wanted to express my appreciation for your efforts. You have touched me in more ways imaginable, and I don't exaggerate when I say that you have contributed to my opinion of Chinese New Year 2010 being one of the best and most exciting ones in years!

It is an honor to be your cousin, Angeline. Congratulations once again to you and Richard, and wishing you both happiness, success, health, wealth, and all things that cultivate peace and love in your heart and everyone around you!

Yours,
Davina

URGENT: Seeking help for imbalanced kitten

UPDATE: We have found an adopter - within half an hour of posting this note up...!
Angels walk among us! Thank you so much for helping us spread the word, and to my dear friends Rosheen and Ashaari for your wonderful offers to help out. Will be checking up on the fella over the next couple of weeks to make sure that he turns out alright.
Thank you all once again - this is so amazing! *Gleams*

Hey Everyone,

My roomie Crystal and I are in a bit of a predicament.

Crystal's colleague found this little buddy in their office parking lot. He was stumbling over himself and mewing madly, alone and in distress. Crystal has taken him to a doctor and the kitten seems to be born with an imbalance problem that he will most likely not grow out of.

The kitten is 2 weeks old and still needs to be trained how to pee and poo on his own (his mother abandoned him before she could teach him herself). He also needs to be fed with a syringe because he doesn't know how to drink from a milk bottle yet. He kinda crawls in circles and tends to claw out at whatever he can grasp, perhaps out of frustration that he can't find his footing. Both Crystal and I are working full-time so it's difficult to take care of him.The situation is urgent because Crystal is moving out in 2 weeks and is doubtful that she'd be able to bring him to her new place.

So I'm considering 3 options:

1) That we look for someone to adopt him
2) That we look for a foster home to at least commit to nurturing him until he's a bit more independent
3) (last resort!) That I seek out someone who can offer a residence that is accessible by LRT and allows me to liberally visit so that I may travel to and fro from work to attend to the kitten during his feeding/potty times etc.

We will help out as much as we can, and I have no problem footing any medical bills in the meantime.

If anyone can offer either one of these 3 options, that would be fantastic and we will give you chocolate or its (dietary) equivalent.

Our contact numbers are below.

Please spread the word!
The blog link to this article is: http://bit.ly/cYtUYJ

Thanks heaps for your support,
Crystal (016-6009667)
Davina (016-2329122)

Cat for adoption: Tigerlily

Hey All,

A friend had alerted me of this. This cat is currently being looked after by a lady called Rena.

"Her name is Tigerlily and she has already been spayed. Tigerlily was rescued from a drain in Taipan USJ when she was about 2 months. She was very dehydrated and skinny then. Now she is about 9 months old and has a unique color. Tigerlily is in fact a very affectionate cat and she likes to be touched. She loves attention and craves for it constantly. She is very much of an indoor cat as she doesn’t like to roam around the neighbourhood.

I wish that someone can adopt her and have her indoors. Currently I have already got 3 dogs at the car porch and 1 pet in the house. It is unlikely I can have her in the house as she and my other pet cannot get along.

I hope you will help to forward this to your friends who would be keen to adopt her."





If you're interested in adopting, please contact Rena at +6 012 2030123 or renachang@hotmail.com.

Please spread the word!

Thanks a mill for supporting animal welfare in Malaysia.

Davina

Open selling of turtle eggs in Kelantan

I spent last weekend in my friend's hometown in the Malaysian state of Kelantan. It was a gorgeous place, with loads of places to go, things to do and food to eat. But if there was any type of food that I had come across there and was vehemently against eating, it was this.

Marine turtle eggs are openly sold in wet markets alongside regular fresh produce. 3 pieces can fetch up to 12 Ringgit.

I've been told that it is illegal to raid turtle nests; however, it is NOT illegal to sell or eat turtle eggs, a loophole that allows the trade to continually flourish.

I was freaking out in the wet market and was laughed at by the egg sellers, completely oblivious to their contribution towards the imminent extinction of marine turtles.

If anyone knows of any appropriate organization, Malaysian or otherwise, which I can express my dissent to, please let me know.

In the meantime, please do your future generations a favor and do not buy turtle eggs. It's up to us as consumers to stop supporting this ridiculous practice of seeking out exotic delicacies.

Libido my arse, you'd have better luck with a pack of Smarties.

Thanks for reading,
Davina